Barton’s Book Reviews

As you may know, Joey Barton of Manchester City became the British football writers’ dream player when he summarized books published by England’s World Cup heroes (TM) thusly: “I played shit. Here’s my book.”

In that spirit, we’ve asked Mr. Barton to do some additional book reviews for this blog, and he has kindly replied with the following:

Fever Pitch, by Nick Hornby: “Arsenal played shit. Here’s my book.”

A Season with Verona, by Tim Parks: “Hellas Verona played shit. Here’s my book.”

Madame Bovary, by Gustav Flaubert: “Monogamy is shit. Here’s my book.”

Anna Karenina, by Leo Tolstoy: “Monogamy is shit. Here’s my book.”

Tropic of Cancer, by Henry Miller: “Not shagging is shit. Here’s my book.”

We were a little concerned that Joey was getting stuck in a rut, so to speak, so we asked him to broaden his horizons a bit.

He came back with:

Heart of Darkness, by Joseph Conrad: “The natives are shit. Here’s my book.”

All Quiet on the Western Front, by Erich Remarque: “Trench warfare is shit. Here’s my book.”

One Hundred Years of Solitude, by Gabriel Garcia Marques: “Realism is shit. Here’s my book.”

That last one seemed to be the limit of Joey’s patience with fiction (not counting Hornby), so he switched to non-fiction. He’s still working through the list, but his first review:

The Ghost Map, by Steven Johnson: “Shit is shit. Here’s my book.”

We await further reviews anxiously.

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3 Responses

  1. Lol

    Nice 🙂

  2. The Dog’s Bollix, that.

  3. […] McDonald’s or beating the shit out of people, we’ve decided to cancel our agreement for further book reviews. Frankly, most of the reviews that we were receiving were of at best politically dubious validity, […]

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